Inspired by a recent letter in the New Scientist…
Obviously you are all aware of Schrodinger’s cat, but have you ever heard of Schrodinger’s socks. It goes like this.
Socks start off as pairs, but which is the left and which is the right. In fact they are both and neither at the same time. And the really interesting thing is that the instant you put one sock on your left foot, the other sock becomes a right sock.
Taking this a step further, if you don’t observe the fact you have put a sock on your left foot, is the other sock still a right sock, for example, in this state, are you more likely to put the second sock on your left foot, and therefore having a second left sock. Going further, in this eventuality, should you take the socks back to the shop, and on the way order your copy of “Whacknut Quarterly”.
O.k. If you got this far and you haven’t fallen into a coma, there is a technical explantion of Schrodinger’s cat on wikipedia. However here is a lay-persons translation.
Schrodinger’s cat is a quantum mechanics conundrum, this basically means it does not really exist, and should not be tried at home with real cats. Basically you stick a cat in a box with some poison attached to a geiger counter monitoring some radioactive substance. At some point the geiger counter triggers the poison and kills the cat. The issue is basically about whether the cat is alive or dead at any given time, and that the wank folk in quantum doo-dah land say the cat is in both states at the same time until you observe the cat and the cat then chooses a state to be in.
You could see how this would seem miraculous to muppets that invent a thing called a Quark, and classify it as one of 6 categories (Up, Down, Left, Right, Strange and Charm)… the first 100 times or so the cat would be alive upon observation, but at some point, regardless of whether the poison was triggered by the geiger counter or not, I reckon you would find little paw marks around the poison container cuz the bloody cat would actually want to be dead.
You can take this Schrodinger thing a step further. If the hypothisis is that while the cat is in the box it is both alive and dead at the same time and only decides at the instant you peek, then there is an interesting possiblity. what if you started with a dead cat? You close the box, it will go into the “alive/dead – can’t decide” state… when you open the box again, could it be brough back to life?
Is that why they put nails in coffins?
Ironically you can actually identify the six quantum states of socks; Left, Right, Up and Down are pretty obvious, but you may need help with the others…
Strange – this is when the tumble dryer monster eats one of a pair, “Hmm… thats ‘Strange’”
Charm – this is a sock that has something nice on it like “Certified Sex God”
SCHROEDINGER’S CAT LIMERICKS
Schroedinger, you should not have done that
That “playing God” with a cat,
Which, by the way, mister
Belonged to your sister
The next time please make it a rat.
Said Schroedinger “poison is nifty
To dispose of this cat, God is thrifty
We can’t tell if it died
Till we all peer inside
And the odds are at just that, 50/50.”
The cat in the box still has growth
Or it’s dead, and infested with sloth
One should not get unnerved
Till the cat is observed
It’s a superposition of both.
So that is the way that you tell it
Leave a cat in a box with a pellet
Should the trigger let go
The poison will flow
And you’ll know the cat’s dead when you smell it.
Said Schroedinger, “let Physics advance
Though it might be kitty’s last dance
When we open the box
Be prepared for some shocks
But there’s only a 50% chance.”
Said Schroedinger, “let’s take a chance
Though it might be kitty’s last dance.”
“The poor cat,” he then joked
“is alive, or it’s croaked”
But you can’t know these things in advance.
Said Schroedinger,” isn’t this fun”
Shot a cat in a box with a gun
I’ll be sure it survives
‘Cause the cat has nine lives
And I’ll only be using just one.”
“…And I’ll only be using just one”
Hmm, unless it was a wayward cat that had gone through 8 lives already, in that case you’d be screwed.