Inspired by a previous post randy elephants, I was asked a question off the cuff.
the question was “How many calories in a mouthful of semen? You know me and questions 
Upon further investigation it seems that a rather simple question was a little vague – elephant or human contributions. So I did a little leg work anyhow, and the following facts were disturbingly presented though google.
- Human sperm is about 1 calorie per mililitre
- Elephant sperm is about 1.4 calories per millilitre
- An average human mouth holds about 360ml
- An average elephant mouth holds about 6000ml
- The average human ejaculation is about 5ml
- The average elephant ejaculation is a bucket splitting 4500ml
So I guess we can summarise as follows
- 1 average human ejaculation into 1 human mouth is about 5 calories
- 1 average human mouthful of 1 very tired human sperm is about 360 calories
- 1 average human mouthful of elephant sperm is 504 calories
- 1 average elephant ejaculation into an average elephant mouth (if they do that) is 6300 calories
- 1 average elephant mouthful of elephant sperm is 8400 calories
- 1 average elephant mouthful of several very dead humans sperm is 6000 calories
There is nothing else to say.